Motivation, that elusive beast… until you find a friend at least!

Okay, can we take a moment to appreciate my rhyme in today’s blog post title before we continue? Motivation, that elusive beast, until you find a friend at least? I didn’t even plan for it to happen, it just did, and it works so well for what this post is about: using buddies to inspire you to finally get shit done! (Go me!)

Okay, moving on…

Motivation, that elusive beast... until you find a friend at least! | Five reasons friends are great when your thoughts on a task move from excitement to frustration | post and illustration by Asti @ bit.ly/atypicalnarrative

Friends who are as blind as I: click on the photo to be able to read/zoom the text.

Wanting to do it but lacking motivation

I feel like we’ve all been there – whether it’s as bloggers or creators or gym-goers. We have the things we need to get things done, we know we want to do it, and yet we just can’t get ourselves to actually put it in action. Somehow, what starts as motivation and excitement for what’s to come slowly drifts into this feeling of impossibility.

I mean, look at this blog. I’ve planned launching atypicalnarrative since… November of 2016? I had the design done, knew what content I wanted to create, had plenty of ideas, even had a stockpile of drawings to pull from. But for some reason I kept feeling like I couldn’t do it. I would have moments of inspiration where I would work of things, but then it would all fall away and I would end up putting it off for another day.

It took me four months to publish my first post and, I’ll be honest, my main motivation was the fact that my good friend Josette launched her blog: Made of Mint. I had one of those “shit, if she can do it so I can!” moments. (And here we are, two months later, already struggling to keep it up.)

But hey, you know what that made me realize? Sometimes the best way to get things done is to brings your friends along for the ride.

Friends to save the day

After I published my first blog post, I realized I needed something (or someone) to help me keep things on track. I took to Twitter to request a blogging buddy and Inge and Iris both volunteered. We came up with a set time, an hour or so on a certain weekday, and devoted that time to motivating each other, discussing our thoughts, and getting shit done.

And you know what? Best decision I ever made for this blog. While I did have a lapse in content this past month, I am finally back on track after reaching out to Iris once again for our weekly blogging sessions (we took a hiatus while Dave was here).

You see, having a “blogging buddy” (or writing buddy, exercising buddy, etc.) is great for so many reasons:

Motivation, that elusive beast... until you find a friend at least! | My current blog buddy and motivation trapper: Iris @ eattrainread.com | post and illustration by Asti @ bit.ly/atypicalnarrative

my current blogging buddy: Iris @ Eat Train Read
(and her cat, Fury, of course)

  • Schedule: Setting aside a certain amount of time each week to dedicate towards what you want to do is so, so beneficial. Knowing that Iris and I are going to each devote a certain hour Mondays and Wednesdays towards blogging automatically puts me in the state of mind of getting things done.
  • Accountability: Of course, sometimes it’s tempting to just shrug your schedule off because you’re not feeling it. This is a lot harder to do if you have a buddy. Even if you can’t actually devote that hour as you intended because other things get in the way, it’s a lot harder to abandon it completely because you know the other person is counting on you. (For example, this week Iris had to work on an essay so couldn’t devote our hour to blogging, which was fine, but she still made herself available to chat with me which meant I still felt supported.)
  • Soundboard: Sometimes its nice to get feedback about a post before publishing it into the wild. Whether it’s struggling with what to write, worrying about a controversial or taboo subject, or just wanting someone to proofread, it can be great to have a buddy around. While Iris and myself don’t actually trade posts that often, we do often talk about the content we’re creating and share our general thoughts on the matter.
  • Motivation: Obviously this is a reason, otherwise this blog post wouldn’t make sense. Beyond the internal motivation that comes with having a buddy, you get external motivation as well. I love that when Iris and I are done with our hour we usually mention what we’ve accomplished and congratulate each other, even if we didn’t do all that we wanted. It helps you recognize your successes instead of obsessing on all the things left to do, which can sometimes be difficult depending on your state of mind.
  • Inspiration: I mean, geesh, without a blogging buddy I wouldn’t have this post, would I? haha. But no, even beyond that, you may find that your discussions with your friend may help you come up with something new that you hadn’t thought of.
  • Friendship: Lastly, and I think this is one of the best things, having a partner working with you towards your goals really helps build up a friendship. I considered Iris a friend prior to this blogging buddy business, but I feel it even more so now that we’ve worked together towards our goals. We devote two hours every week towards working together and I enjoy the chats that go with it – even when they go outside the blogging realm. ❤

I mean, I think you get the gist. Having a friend working with you towards accomplishing the same goal makes capturing the elusive beast of motivation so much easier. If there’s something on your list that you’ve wanted to get done but haven’t found the time/motivation, consider asking for a buddy online. I highly recommend it.

(And now, back to our regular schedule of nonsense content because this whole “tips/advice” post makes me a little squeamish. Since when do I feel able to recommend how to do things to others? I’m no role model!)

Asti signature

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What do you think? Has anyone else had success wrangling their motivation with the aid of a partner? What kinds of tasks do you feel you need help getting done? If anyone is looking for a yoga, C25K, or art partner, let me know. While I’m working on sticking to a daily schedule in which they’re included, I’ve been pretty hit or miss on my own so far. 

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5 Comments

  1. Love the drawing of Iris and little Fury! So cute!

    I seriously need a way of motivating me to do things sometimes.

    Iris is good at cheering friends on! ❤

    I’m glad you’re persevering with blogging, I love your posts! It’s OK to take a break now and then if you need it though. 😊

  2. Firstly, the title of this post = so catchy!! And so wise!

    Secondly, I love that you linked your photo to your drawing! I couldn’t read it lol. And I love those pyjamas, they’re pink and cute.

    Thirdly, I know what you mean about being so excited for something and the drive slipping away so you become less excited and more frustrated. Me and the gym have this sort of relationship. I had all of these big ideas about going in the morning before work. I did that for one week, and then it became too hard and I was too tired, and there was nothing tying me to the act of gyming in the morning. I had no accountability for it! I still go during my lunch break at work, but it’s not the same because I have a lot more time in the morning and the gym isn’t as full. Plus morning gyming gave me so much more energy for the day!

    Having a blogging buddy is SO the way to go! I’m really happy you’ve found something that works for you! It sounds like you guys really inspire each other, it’s really nice 🙂

    I used to have a gym buddy, we split a PT together for 6 months. And it was the best. I HAD to go to the gym otherwise I felt like I was letting her down. And I never missed a PT session unless I was really sick. So it really worked. My friend no longer lives in London, and none of my other friends go to the same gym I do. But I feel like I could have a gym buddy that went to a different gym and we just held each other accountable. It might work!

    Arghh I really want to learn how to run! C25K sounds really interesting, I know so many people that have done it! I’m super scared of committing to something like that though because I hate running, with a passion. I have sever asthma, so running always gives me asthma attacks. I mean, running on a treadmill for literally 1 minute makes me really breathless, let alone running outside lol. But I feel like this is the sort of thing that would help me conquer that fear. Like the more running I do, the easier it will become, the more fit I will become, ergo the fewer asthma attacks I will have. But this is only a theory lol. I really need to test it out!

    But not this week (or perhaps the next), I currently have an inner ear infection that is wreaking havoc on my balancing skills and the skill of even standing up for longer than 5 minutes :/ I’m so over it!

    Do you enjoy running at all?

    Jordon @ Simply Adrift

  3. I love having you as a blogging buddy! It really motivates you to actually sit down and get some work done. It’s really helpful to know that someone is doing the same. ❤

  4. Asti, this is such a brilliant idea! I’d like to have blogging buddies, too. That sounds lovely. I like the idea of having friends who can hold you accountable to your writing duties. That drawing of Iris is awesome. I have quite a few writing things I want to get done. Novels, poems, blogs.

  5. I love the title! Nice work.

    I agree with you, buddies definitely help. I wish I could find buddies for more areas of life, haha. I’m so glad having a blogging buddy is working for you, though, because I love reading your posts.

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